Can’t Find a Date?


Most singles want to date.  Everyone wants to meet fun and interesting people, experience that thrill and joy of a night out or a comfortable evening in with someone nice, and maybe, just maybe, find that special someone with whom they simply fit like a glove.

But, where are they?  Instead of that moonlight romance, ladies, maybe your Saturday is yet another girls-night-out, and you’re wondering if there’s nothing more.  Or, worse, instead of a night on the town you find yourself again curled up alone with a Hallmark movie, your cat, and a pint of Cookies-and-Cream.  Or guys, instead of laughing with that delightful lady on your arm, you’re hanging out watching yet another ball game with the guys, or…maybe it’s Friday night and you’re dejectedly working alone on that massive pile of laundry.

Nothing wrong with those activities.  Nothing at all.  But you’d like something more.

And in that moment, perhaps you wonder, “Why can’t I find a date?”

Why is getting a date so hard?  Perhaps you’ve had some of these thoughts:

·         “All the good ones are gone.  They’ve already been snatched up.”

·         “There aren’t enough men or women out there.  The ratio of available men to women is against me.”

·         “There’s no one around here to date.  It’s like living in a wilderness.”

·         “The nice and interesting ones are just boring, and the attractive ones are shallow.”

You may have a collection of your own.

Sometimes there’s some truth in these excuses, and it’s tempting to fall back on them.  At least, they give some explanatory solace on a cold and lonely Saturday night.  But, these ideas make it sound like the problems are solely external, that it’s a problem with the world around us.  They kind of make us think that the dilemma is how to find eligible women or men.

Circumstances may be a problem, sure, but they may not be the problem.  Look realistically around you:  There are plenty of people in relationships, so maybe the issue isn’t around you.  Instead of looking just at the externals, maybe it’s time to turn the focus elsewhere, and look at an important common factor in your situation.

You.

Curious?  In this series, we’re going to talk about how you can get personally involved in resolving your own dating dilemma, and step-by-step, start to change your thinking, gain and sharpen your skills, and push past the blockers.  Are you willing to try and maybe, just maybe, take responsibility for yourself?

Happy dating!

Previous
Previous

Divided We Fall